Oysters! Mussels!

Food Bazaar has a sale on oysters and clams and mussels. The oysters and clams are $4 for a dozen. They're usually $5 this time of year, and that's still cheap. You can get 2 lbs of mussels for $2.49. If you're lucky enough to know someone who got an oyster shucker for Christmas, you should buy a dozen and drop by his house. And realistically, if you're reading this, you know someone who got an oyster shucker for Christmas.

No groceries for me

I can't buy any groceries until I'm in Pittsburgh. They'll go bad.

But watch out! I am going to hit the roof when I see the price of limes. And pecorino romano.

I do have to go to Brighton Beach to find some kvass today.

Citrus

I'm going to develop a signature non-alcoholic drink for a dinner party I'm hosting next week. And I think I need citrus.

I got a grapefruit, a pink grapefruit, a lemon, a lime, a juice orange, a tangerine, and 2 clementines. That cost me $2.60. I'd hate to see what Giant Eagle would want for that. I got every citrus they had except the navel orange.

Great Beer News

Baltika Extra Lager is back at Western Beef. The bottle is redesigned, but the price is still $1.88 for 51 oz. of 8% ABV lager.

Some Good Deals at Key Food

Orange juice was $1.69 for a carton, so I'm going to drink some screwdrivers when the sun sets. Colavita crushed tomatoes are still $1.50. C-Town charges a premium for them. The Key Food tomato sauces were 3/$1 and I want to make chili soon so those will be good. Eggs were $1.79, which is an ok price. It beats C-Town. Giardinera was $2. Rice is $1.49 for a pound. The 2 pound bags are $2.99, so I think I'll just save myself the penny and let them store the extra pound for more. That's penny-wise AND pound-wise. Milk is $2.69 for a half gallon. I have no idea if that's a good price. I can never run for president because despite buying milk and having a grocery blog, I don't know the price of milks.

They had buttermilk for either $2 or $2.50. Trader Joe's has it for $1.69, same brand. These buttermilks all expired yesterday or in 3 days. With prices like that, no wonder they have no turnover. With no turnover, no wonder they have prices like that. Not my problem--I'll wait til I'm at Trader Joe's.

Oysters for Thanksgiving

GQ taught me to eat oysters and drink champagne before Thanksgiving dinner. And so when I head off to Krys and Quentin's later today, I am going to chuck oysters with a butter knife and open the André and do just that.

Food Bazaar has had pretty good oysters every time I've had them. The price went down since I last looked too! Maybe they're in season. They're only $5 for a dozen. I bought 2. I got 3 lemons too. I like oysters with lemon juice and a dab of hot sauce.

In Pittsburgh, 2 dozen oysters cost $28. I guess there are some advantages to living on the coast.

Tesco Uses Slave Labor

In America, at least our stores pay their employees.

Britain's Shame

Key Food Saw Me Comin'!

I just glanced at the weekly circular and saw that C-Town has Barilla pasta for $0.86! I overspent to the tune of $0.14/lb yesterday. Now I have to go to C-Town and buy enough to bring my average cost lower.

The new pasta norm

I went to Key Food today and stocked up on pasta because Barilla was 5/$5 (must buy 5 and have the card). I got fettucine, linguine, medium shells, gemelli, and penne rigate. Lesser sales only offer spaghetti, elbows, ziti, penne, and rotelle, so I stocked up on diversity.

I thought back to my first year of this blog, back before I forgot the password. I used to be outraged by pasta that cost a dollar. In this post called Giant Eagle Really Sucks written on Christmas in 2006, I said I only pay $0.50 or $0.67 for a pound of pasta. (Giant Eagle has its charms. I hope they hire my brother. They could do a lot worse than hiring from a family of grocery lovers.)

Ricotta was on sale for $2.99 for 32 oz. It's hard to find ricotta at a decent price anymore, so when I find it, I buy it. It made my toast good last night, but now I'm out of bread. I didn't like the price of any bread at Key Food. I got some sugar free preserves (only the sugar free kind was on sale: $1.99) and ate it with a ripped up bagel and peanut butter I got from Trader Joe's.

Trader Joe's peanut butter reminds me of why I like preservatives. I really dislike their peanut butter.

Trader Joe's Always Does This to Me

I went to Trader Joe's today because I had to go to Manhattan. I spent about $26. I bought olive oil, canola oil, a can of cannelini beans, frozen peas, frozen broccoli, frozen spinach, frozen asparagus, gorgonzola, buttermilk, and beer. Everything was a good price and so I spent more than usual (I rarely spend $20 on a single trip.)

Yet I still don't know what to eat for dinner. I might drink olive oil.

This afternoon before I went, I tried concocting a meal of rice, broccoli, sardines, soy sauce, and hot sauce. Unfortunately for him, Dylan dropped in while I was cooking it, so I fed him some.

Update: Toast!

Key Food's Pre-Thanksgiving Circular is 10 Pages!

I like Fridays because the new circulars come up on the grocery sites.


My local Key Food

It's instant coffee, not instant gold

I went to Associated to get some instant Cafe Bustelo coffee. I can find it for $4.99 when it's on sale or $5.49 when it's not. At Associated, it was $6.39! So I left and went to Key Food for it.

At Key Food, I bought eggs that were $1.69. They were $1.25 at Associated. So I still came out ahead.

Balsamic vinegar ketchup.

Heinz is going to make balsamic vinegar ketchup.

And they are going to sell it through their Facebook page first, which will cost $2 extra. I will buy it, but I'm going to wait to find it at C-Town. And I don't know why my font is weird (copying and pasting troubles) so this post is over.

P.S. I like the label. You can see it if you click the link.

Finally, Gorgonzola at a Reasonable Price

Today I went to Manhattan. I was at Chelsea Piers for the first time. Then I walked around for a while. I found a Western Beef I didn't know existed on West 16th St. It's much smaller than the one in Ridgewood, but the prices are the same, which means it's possible to live in Manhattan after all.

 How beautiful. I didn't buy anything though. I like my Western Beef better and I wanted to go to Trader Joe's.

I went to the one on 6th Avenue and 21st St. I had never been there either. What a pleasure. The store wasn't crowded at all. I guess I was hungry because I finally bought food. I got gorgonzola for $5.99/lb, which is a really good price. I got a 6 pack of some store brand of their beer that I had at Roxy's before for $3.99. I don't think it's bad. It's 6.2% alcohol, so it's strong regardless. I got frozen peas and frozen artichoke hearts for $1.29 and $2.99 respectively. I need the artichokes for pungent pasta (along with the gorgonzola) and C-Town quit having the ones I liked before.

I need the picture to remember what else I got. Frozen party (meaning small) meatballs are $3.99 now. They used to be cheaper. They're good for my spaghetti. Buttermilk is only $1.69 there. I had a glass after dinner. I got some peanut butter, which is cheaper than those national brands anyway. I guess that's my effort to stock up before the looming price increase. It was $1.79. I got a can of cannelini beans for $0.89. I ate them.

I considered getting some oregano for $1.99, but I got a brand at a dollar store for $1 yesterday. Maybe I should try using that up quick.

So now I need to make pungent pasta.

Everyday With Rachael Ray Magazine values its readers' time at about $2.40 an hour

Everyday with Rachael Ray features a "showdown" between two similar products in every issue. In this one, it's canned dinner rolls (e.g. Pillsbury) against the rolls you'd buy premade from the bakery. I can't find a link to this on their website, but the page looks like this.

The relevant info they provide is that the canned rolls are $0.23 each and the bakery ones are $0.29 each. Six cents is what you save! And prep times are 12 minutes and 5 seconds (essentially 0. If I'm going to count 5 seconds of prep time, I might as well count the extra second to put the roll in my mouth and the extra 15 to chew.)

You get 8 rolls in a can. They take 12 minutes to bake, so you could bake 5 batches and get 40 rolls in an hour. This would cost you $9.25. And you worked for an hour.

Using the price they provided for the bakery rolls, $3.49 for 12, you'd pay $11.67 for 40 rolls. So for your hour of work, you save $2.42. Which means that is how much your time is worth, all else (meaning quality of rolls) being equal.

When comparing the 8 to 12, they favor 8 because with the bakery rolls, "you're usually committed to to buying a bigger batch." I had to gloss over that to figure out how much your time is valued per hour to make the canned cheaper. But I'll still accept and address a quantity argument.

The bakery rolls are bigger. You don't need as many. And at all the grocery stores I go to, the rolls are loose. I can buy as many as I want. I usually do not want 8. 8 is either too many or too few if I'm feeding 5 people. The bakery buns and rolls let me have control.

In summary, the canned rolls are better if you have infinite time or don't value yours and if you have infinite oven space. Otherwise, they are a good example of being penny wise and pound foolish.

Texts from the Field: Sugar Water

Timmy had a job interview near Harrisburg. He sent along this picture with the commentary "Only a fool would buy this! People say pop is only sugar water. This actually is! And costs more!"

Here are some other pictures he sent.

Less Pretentious than Nutella - peanut butter and chocolate icing

This is what my peanut butter and chocolate icing on toast meal looks like. It's very good. It's less pretentious than Nutella and probably just as healthy, if not more. I might not feed this to my children, but I would feed it to my grandchildren.

Peanut Butter. Oh no!

Via (Lewis via) Lifehacker:

The time to buy peanut butter is now, friends. The Wall Street Journal reports that prices for Jif, Peter Pan, and other peanut butter jars will be going up as much as 40% starting in a couple of weeks.

Just when I invented a new food that is good for toast. It's a lot like peanut butter and jelly, only better. It is peanut butter and chocolate icing from a can. It also works on saltines. I bought a jar of Reese's brand for $2.99, which was already a bit cheaper than Jif or Skippy.

Good thing I don't have a job. I used to eat PB&J every day for lunch. Or let me take that back. It would be good if I had a job so I could afford peanut butter.  (By the way, this blog kinda sorta got me a job but it was only for a few weeks and it's over and it made me tired of adjectives.)

Key Food has some good sales right now. So does Jesus.

I haven't been that interested in eating or cooking lately, but that might be because there weren't any good deals. I had a good time at Key Food today though, and later I'm going to figure out how to cook things.

Key Food had mozzarella for $1.99/lb. I got that. Earlier I got 2 lbs of ricotta for $2.99, which is the best price I've seen in months. So I have cheeses again. I bought Hunt's barbecue sauce for $1.29, which I think is a good price. I don't buy it very often. Fresh mushrooms were $0.99 for an 8 oz package. I got some iodized salt for $0.69. It's usually $0.79, so don't make a special trip. I got iodized because I don't want a goiter.

I went to Jesus on the way home. They have avocados for $1, but I didn't get any. I bought fennel for the first time. I don't think I've ever even tasted it, but from what I learned in my studies, it looks like dill and tastes like absinthe.

Grocery Texts I Get

On Friday, I got a text from a number I didn't know: Hey mike, it's Anthony, where is good to food shop in Bushwick? I'm off montrose L.

I said to go to Food Bazaar if he's close. It's on Broadway and Manhattan, which is possibly like the Montrose L. He used to live off the Hewes stop and I hope he was shopping there then. Maybe my advice wasn't helpful.

On Monday, Ravi said in a text "you would be very disappointed to know how much I'm spending to make meatballs at home." I can only imagine! I saw the meat I would use to make meatballs for $2.99/lb at Key Food. I think you should use cheap meat for meat balls. You're going to season it heavily anyway.

Bravo almost stole me away from C-Town

Bravo used to be Cat Pee, but it remodeled and fired the cat. Now it's well-lit and the food is nicer looking and it's still cheap. I had a pleasant time there today. I was about to announce that it won me over from C-Town until they wouldn't let me use a credit card because my purchase wasn't $10. I can't commit to spending $10 every time I go to a grocery store, so now I won't go there often.

Tons of Bad News about C-Town

Remember the last time I tried to say something nice about C-Town? I praised their price of frozen vegetables. I guess they marked that broccoli down to $0.99 because they were getting bags with a new design that they charge $3.49/lb or so for. There is now not a single thing for which I'd go to C-Town over any other local grocery store. I guess I know its hours and it's open late, and sometimes it has beer on the way to where I'm headed.

The other bad thing is that I was just ousted as the Foursquare mayor. Usually you get ousted when you haven't been to a place for a while, not 30 minutes after you get back from it. Based on my feelings about C-Town, I doubt I'll have that mayorship back anytime soon, but maybe I can get Key Food's again.

Good Sales for the week of 9/16 - 9/23

There aren't any. I'm not leaving the house.

The best thing about C-Town anymore: frozen food

It seems like their prices are going up faster than other stores around here, but the one thing you can still find cheap there is frozen vegetables.

I got this 1 lb bag of broccoli for $0.99. So while I was there, I got some fish sticks and salsa. They brought back my favorite brand, La Costeña, which is both the cheapest and the spiciest. It's made in Mexico.

Seafood Deals at Food Bazaar

I've been reading a book about oysters and New York City that Dylan left here, so I went to Food Bazaar to peep their seafood. They have the best prices in this part of town and they don't say your selection is gross and wipe off their hands and cash register before finishing your transaction like Key Food does.

Oysters and clams are $4 for a dozen. They were $3 in February, but this isn't bad.
Mussels are $3 for a bag, which holds 2 lbs. That's a great deal.
Live crabs are $2.49/lb. I think that's a good deal, but I've never had a crab. If someone wants to buy a crab and prepare it for me and tell me how to eat it, I will tell you where to get them for a pretty good price.
Medium raw shrimp are $4.99/lb, which is also a pretty good deal.
I think the octopus was $3.99/lb, but I don't know how much octopus should be. The only time I tried cooking it I made a very very chewy food.

Lobster is $5.99/lb, which is a very low price as far as I can tell for lobster. Like crab, I've never had one. Everything I know about cooking lobsters and crabs I learned from the Little Mermaid.

Grocery Shopping as Civic Duty

President Obama just took to the airwaves to tell us denizens of the northeast to go grocery shopping.

Don't mind if I do, Mr. President.

R.I.Pee

Compare Foods on Grand St, better known as "cat pee" because of its most distinguishing feature, has shuttered and reopened as a Bravo. I haven't checked it out yet. I wonder if they fired the cat.

Giant Eagle Sucks - Produce Edition

I'm in Pittsburgh for the weekend so I can go eye Giant Eagle. By the way, "Giant Eagle sucks" is usually one of the most frequent search terms that lead people to this blog. I think people look it up a lot.

I was horrified by the produce prices.

 Here you have limes that cost more than lemons. You have limes that cost more than gold. At Western Beef a lemon is 5/$2 and a lime is 14/$2. No wonder people in Pittsburgh don't make ceviche.

 I wouldn't pay more than $1.50 for an avocado in Brooklyn. $2.50? No wonder people in Pittsburgh don't make guacamole.

Eggplant was $1.99/lb ($0.99 in Brooklyn). Zucchini was $0.99/lb, which is the same. I said to my mother that the price wasn't bad. She said zucchini around here at this time of summer is usually $0.00/lb because people grow it and have too much and beg you to take it from them. You can't beat free.

 Here was Giant Eagle's strength. I'd be delighted to find buttermilk in Brooklyn for under $2.19 for a quart. $1.35 is amazing! Why does Giant Eagle subsidize its buttermilk with its produce?

And below the jump, the results of its blood pressure machine. That's my favorite part of Giant Eagle.

I'm like a fox and Western Beef is the henhouse

Because I just came out of there with a lot of chicken.

If I told you to buy 13 lbs of chicken, how much would you expect to pay? $10.50? $12? $18 even?!

No, not at Western Beef. Look at this deal.

 Your eyes aren't fooling you. That says $0.49/lb! They are practically paying you to take it off their hands. If I know anything about you, you are probably already halfway out there door to get to Western Beef and buy some chicken.

Wait. There's more!

Do they even have margaritas in Pittsburgh?

My brother told me that my parents drink margaritas now. Even at home! How is that possible/affordable? A single lime costs about $0.70 at Giant Eagle. For comparison, I can get 6-10 limes for $1 now, depending on where I go. I buy so many limes because they're so cheap that I throw a lot away. It's worth it to have the option for a lime.

The Whiskey Rebellion Was Fought Over This

It turns out $6.49 for Haller's Whiskey is before tax, which is $0.39 in PA. I get Fleischmann's for $6.50 total, so I win.

The Whiskey Rebellion happened near Pittsburgh, by the way. If I ever invent a distillery, I'm going to make it in Pittsburgh and dub it Rebellion Whiskey.

Still not the mayor of Western Beef (plus the most heinous use of Instagram ever)

 I went to Western Beef to get a loaf of bread. It's $1.79 for wheat bread there and you have to pay at least $2.50 anywhere else. Sometimes $3.79! I figured I'd look at the ricotta cheese too because that's good on toast. I didn't get any. What happened to the price of ricotta? I used to pay $2 for a pound of it (when it was on sale) and now it's more like $4. Maybe I should make my own?

I got a Florida avocado for $0.99. I've never eaten one before--only Haas. I bought one last year but I let it go bad.

I also bought DeCecco pasta for the first time. It was finally affordable. It was $1/box. The non-sale price was $2.19. I wonder if it's better than the Ronzoni/San Giorgio/Barilla I usually buy. I hope not, because I don't want to acquire any fancy tastes.

I wonder what this Warka beer is like. "Unique taste" and "strong beer" make me think it's awful in a way that I'd learn to like.

And I got some sardines. And then I took a picture of my receipt and used Instagram on it. I think this might be the worst, most heinous, abuse of Instagram in its storied history.

Bushwick Groceries

I don't know if blog posts get better than this one from BushwickBK. It's a grocery price survey of all the stores in Bushwick. I overpay for eggs.

You'd think this blog would do original reporting like that, but I think my focus is even narrower. But here are my tips.

Buy frozen foods, especially vegetables, at C-Town.
Buy canned foods at Western Beef. Except crushed tomatoes, which come from C-Town or Key Food.
Buy fresh vegetables at the Jesus store. It's called To the World Farm or something. It's next to Associated.
Recycle your shopping bags at Key Food. You can get pasta there or at C-Town.
Get pork butt from Associated. Get bags of beans from Associated.

A Lamentation

A life full of party leftovers is a life without a reason to go to the grocery store. And now my life lacks its organizing principle. I'd do other people's grocery shopping. I bought Greg a bottle of Cholula, but that has been delivered now. I went to 4 stores because I didn't care for the price at the first one and the second one didn't have it and the third only had weird flavors. C-Town had it for $3/bottle, which is the lowest you'll ever find it anywhere.

4th of July Party Planning

Watching me plan a party and buy groceries for it is such a sight that I don't know why more people don't want to watch me do it. I have my menu spreadsheet. Then I go to all the stores and compare the prices on everything I'm not already familiar with the price for. Days and days of nothing but grocery stores. I try to keep each trip to $10-$20. It makes my heart hurt to think that I've also made about 6 trips so far. If I spent all that money at the same time, I'd cry. I'm poor.

 This is the table of things that don't have to be refrigerated and aren't whiskey. There's orangeade for tint that I found at C-Town on sale. Jugs of apple juice for the american drink (whiskey and apple juice). Cups and plates. Hot dog buns are $1.50 for 12 at Western Beef. Cheez whiz was $3.99 at Key Food this week. Prices ranged up to $5.69 for it. You can't see the Bac-o's. They make part of my baked potato dogs. There are 2 boxes of gemelli there that I'm goign to turn into a pesto pasta salad with tomatoes and mozzarella (so it's like caprese).

In my refrigerator are sour cream, the mozzarella, parsley, basil, celery, lettuce, and I forget what else.

I accidentally made 10 lbs of chickpea orzo salad. That's what 1 bag of chick peas and 2 boxes of orzo will get you. It's not done yet because I still have to add the parsley and taste it. I might buy a can of chick peas. I don't know if I like this ratio right now.

I still need to buy 8 bottles of wine for tint (generously contributed by Agnes on the condition that I do the legwork) and maybe some more hot dog buns and ketchup. I ate all the ketchup I had on pasta the other night. I better check out my mustard situation too.

I am currently in a very very bad mood. I often get in one as I get ready for a party. Right now I am rehearing every criticism ever made of me that I'm too cheap and shouldn't use lemon juice from a bottle, for instance. Or that tint is gross because it's not sangria. I am willing to give out very affordable black eyes to anyone who suggests such a thing to me tomorrow.

3 grocery stores

I went to 3 grocery stores and I still forget to buy mint tea. I should be shot.

4 Grocery Stores

I went to 4 grocery stores today. I bought the most expensive bananas ($0.79/lb) and I paid $1.89 for Fresca. I should be shot.

At last, Tuna Bean Salad

I've been talking about this recipe for a long time and eating it even slightly longer. It's pretty good. I served it to my family on Christmas Eve and it was a hit. It's also really easy and pretty cheap. It's mostly from Mark Bittman, but he'd yell at me for some of my shortcuts, so I'm just going to say it's mine. Plus, I make it for me and he doesn't. But I'll tell you where he'd do it differently.

 Here's what you need for it. Olive oil (only about 2 Tbsp), 2 cans of tuna, a can of white beans, some parsley, some lemon juice, and black pepper. Mark Bittman says to use fresh parsley and real lemon juice. Fresh parsley does make it better, but it's good with dried stuff too. The dried stuff is mostly for your eyes, but you can taste it a bit. You also need some onion, preferably red.

You can get the tuna for 4/$3 at Western Beef. I tried using the more expensive white albacore kind once but liked it less. It's drier.  Beans should be under $1 per can. Sometimes I use small white navy beans. I don't really care if you change what kind of beans you use every time you eat it, but white beans make it look the nicest.

 First, drain and add the tuna.

 Then drain and add the beans.

 Add some diced red onion. When I buy a red onion, I dice the whole thing then use about this much for the tuna bean salad and put the rest in a bag in the refrigerator for next time. I use red onion for some other things, but mostly for this.

 I added about 2 Tbsp of olive oil and maybe about 3 Tbsp of lemon juice here. You can't tell, so I just stirred everything up. If I were using a real lemon, I'd use the juice of half a lemon I think. You don't want lemon soup, but you do want more acid than oil.

 Underneath that parsley is 10 twists of the pepper grinder. I used a heavy hand with the parsley here.

Then I stirred it up. Now it's festering in the refrigerator because it's better when the flavors meld and it's better chilled.

Eat it plain or on toast or crackers or crostini (more words for toast = more excuses for toast).

I got some good deals at Key Food

This is from a trip a few days ago. I hope I remember how much I paid for everything. The eggs I remember. They were $0.99 for a dozen large. You could get extra large for $1.99. Pierogies were $2.50. "Meat" hot dogs were $1.69. I don't buy nice hot dogs because I don't care. I just want a method to eat ketchup. Crushed tomatoes were $1.50. I already had some, but I use them a lot. The pasta was $1 and it rang up as $1, unlike at C-Town where it was $1 and rang up as $1.69 and made me mad. The artichoke hearts were $1.69, which is more than what C-Town charges for the La Squisita ones I like, but they don't seem to stock them anymore. Frozen broccoli was $1.46 for a pound.

I guess I have food I could eat. I was going to put ketchup on noodles for lunch. I can't get enough ketchup lately.

Vodka's getting pricier

At BQE Liquors, the price of my Seagram's vodka went up $1 to $16.53. Now the dignity premium* I pay for the smooth vodka in the bumpy bottle is $3.

Fleischmann's whiskey is still $6/bottle.

*The dignity premium is how much extra I pay to have a jug of vodka that isn't in a plastic jug that I can share with guests with dignity. My dignity. I assume my guests intend to lose theirs if they're guzzling vodka.

What you can get for a dime

This is my favorite song about what you can buy for a dime.

Also, you can buy Fresca for $1.25 at Key Food now.

I got my Fresca.

And for $0.74! Worth the wait.

Western Beef has 2 liter Coke products on sale for $0.74 (limit 5) with an additional $10 purchase. That's not hard to do. I was almost out of pecorino romano anyway ($5.99/lb) and I live on the tuna bean salad I've been promising you a recipe for (4 cans for $3). Pre-toast is $1.79 a loaf now. Used to be $1.69, but I've been reading about the price of wheat and it costs me at least $2.50 anywhere else.

Know what I didn't buy?

Sardines! They used to be $1.15. I guess I'll just starve or buy the $1.29 sardines at C-Town and Key Food. You could argue that making a separate trip over $0.04 is stupid, but if you don't care about $0.04 I'll let you send me all the $0.04s you don't want via Paypal.

I buy a lot of Dairy

I went to Key Food today to buy Fresca, which is advertised at 5 2 liter bottles for $5, and San Giorgio pasta, which is supposed to be 5/$4. They have no Fresca. Sometimes they carry it, but not when it's on sale I guess. And there were no signs up for the pasta, and I don't trust them so I didn't fix either of my problems.

I got milk, cheese, butter, yogurt, and Gatorade. I'm only missing buttermilk.

I only really want to eat toast anyway, so who needs pasta and Fresca?

Why I Keep Shopping at Western Beef

As my unemployment benefits ran out today, my mind turned to converting my illiquid assets to liquid ones. And as far as I can tell, cheap beer is more liquid than a dollar bill, and that's why I go to Western Beef, even in the rain.

Here's what I hauled in today.

The first item is 1% milk. I just started noticing the price of milk, which means I can survive a gotcha question when I run for president. At Key Food, a half gallon of milk is $2.50. The second item there is Vintage tonic water. At Key Food, I can get the store brand for $1. $0.67 is a $0.33 subsidy to my gin consumption.

I got some white beans for $0.67 too. I turn that into a tuna salad that I'll show you sometime. It's pretty good. I served it to my family for Christmas Eve and they liked it.

Next is a jar of anchovies for $3.49. I pay between $4.99 and $5.49 for a similar sized jar at Key Food and C-Town.

And finally, my traditional 3 bottles of Baltika. At $1.88/bottle, my assets could hardly be more liquid.

My Typical Western Beef Trip

Since the weather got nice enough for me to bike everywhere, I've been going to Western Beef a lot. And since I discovered Baltika, I've been going even more. Here's my typical haul: 3 Baltikas, a half gallon of milk, and a bunch of fish products. Baltika is Europe's second largest brewery, according to Wikipedia. These bottles are imported from Russia. They're $1.88 for 51 oz, which is 1.5L. They're 8% alcohol. They only look foamy there because they just survived a ride on my bike. They're either so cheap because the ruble is so weak, their best by date is in 2 weeks, or because they're not that good. I, however, have acquired the taste. It's rather sweet. I'd serve it at a brunch with oatmeal, but not with huevos rancheros.

The sardines and tuna are pretty good prices too. I can find sardines on sale for $1/less sometimes, but $1.15 is the most consistent low price and I eat them a lot. I never find tuna for less than 4/$3.

You're looking at Delallo's Fan of the Week

Every week Delallo names a fan of the week based on submissions of memories of the store/brand. So last week I decided to win myself a free t-shirt and this week I won it. I wrote about how excited I was to see their products in Key Food for the first time.

Yesterday I took Greg to Western Beef. Western Beef should name me fan of the year for how many people I've made go there.

I'm on to you, groceries!

I knew 59 ounces was a weird size for my orange juice. The New York Times says this is how we get inflation in food. It's because we're very price sensitive but not very quantity sensitive.

Ms. Stauber, 33, said she began inspecting her other purchases, aisle by aisle. Many canned vegetables dropped to 13 or 14 ounces from 16; boxes of baby wipes went to 72 from 80; and sugar was stacked in 4-pound, not 5-pound, bags, she said.

Five or so years ago, Ms. Stauber bought 16-ounce cans of corn. Then they were 15.5 ounces, then 14.5 ounces, and the size is still dropping. “The first time I’ve ever seen an 11-ounce can of corn at the store was about three weeks ago, and I was just floored,” she said. “It’s sneaky, because they figure people won’t know.

Now I have a new thing to keep my eyes peeled for.

Eggs on Special at Associated. Beans, no.

I went to Associated today to buy some jalapeno peppers because my jar was running low and I devised a way to mass produce huevos rancheros which is going to make me famous. They were $1.59/lb, which isn't bad. At Key Food they're $4.99/lb. They were on the old side, so I almost left, but I saw medium eggs for $1.25. You can't beat that with a stick! You always want small eggs when you're making huevos rancheros, especially with my new way.

I was also in the market for some celery salt, but they didn't have it. I wanted chick peas, but they wanted $1/can for them and I was having none of that. $0.80 is appropriate. I needed milk too, but I don't think they have enough turnover of milk for it to be good so I still have to go shopping later. I didn't think their price on Mexican crema was that good either.

Here's what I do with my peppers. I chop them up and stick them in my jar of vinegar and salt. Later, they're good.















And here's the secret to mass producing huevos rancheros. Use a muffin pan. It's all in there. The best part is either that the tortilla is not soggy or greasy or that you don't need a fork or a knife to eat these. You can pick them up and they're perfect.

By my reckoning, I will be able to feed 12 people 2 eggs each for about $12, which is how much my huevos rancheros cost the last time I ordered them in a restaurant. And these are better, so I won't name the restaurant.

Key Food's Good Deals and a Recipe for Eggs

It's been a while since I felt like I got a good deal at Key Food. Today I did. Their egg prices are reasonable again. I got a dozen medium for $1.69. I got a 32 oz Powerade for $1, which is good since I imagine I might be drinking my way through this weekend at times. I got some Tree Ripe orange juice for $1.99. And I got Mezzetta hot peppers for $1.50. They're usually $2 there, and I will still happily pay that. Oh, and butter for $2.99.

Here is my recipe for how I eat my eggs every day. It's nothing fancy, but it gives me an excuse to eat toast and it's the best thing I know how to do to eggs this side of huevos rancheros. It involves the Mezzetta peppers. You can use Golden Greek too. As long as it's spicy.

In a frying pan, put a generous dose of olive oil. You're going to eat this oil, so don't overwhelm the pan, but don't skimp either. Heat it. Start making your toast. Put some peppers in the oil and pour some of the brine in it too. You're going to fry the egg in the oil at the same time as you're sorta poaching it in the brine. When this gets nice and hot, crack your eggs into the pan. Grind some black pepper on it. When the yolk starts to set, you're done. You can speed this up by spooning some hot liquid over the yolk, but I don't feel like dirtying a spoon so I just wait. Put everything in the pan on a plate--the oil/spicy brine mixture is good to eat with toast. Eggs are good for toast. Toast is inherently great.

How to Turn Last Week's C-Town Specials into One of the Best Foods I've Made

 Yesterday I invited Dylan over for dinner before I knew what to make, so I went to C-Town. The manager let me know the Heinz pickles I requested are in now. I wandered the aisles with only vague ideas of what to make. Luckily, I had bought all types of pasta earlier in the week because Ronzoni was 4/$3. And all I can ever improvise is pasta.

I decided something like baked ziti, but made only on a stove top, would be good. I got hot sausage, which was $1 off. I don't know why it seems to be on my receipt twice, two different ways. I got a can of Colavita crushed tomatoes, which they now carry for me at $1.50. I bought some frozen spinach because Laura told me I need to have Vitamin E if I want to quit being ugly in one specific way. Mozzarella was on sale. I already had the pasta. I also had some frozen onions that they sell and I like to keep on hand because, like I told Dylan, I'm never going to chop an onion for fewer than 6 people. I tasted one out of the bag and it tasted like an onion. You'd expect that from something whose only ingredient is "onions." I also threw in some garlic powder, a ton of pecorino romano, and some dried parsley. I got those at Key Food, but you can get them at C-Town too.

C-Town Pasta and what other people think of it.

C-Town has Ronzoni on sale. Only the 5 basics (spaghetti, ziti rigate, ziti, elbows, and thin spaghetti I think) for 4/$3. That's almost a 2006 price there.

I just saw this on Tumblr:

Is it sad that I couldnt voice my true opinion that my local grocery store’s clerks are consistently shitty about packing the groceries (really all the cans and the diet dr pepper in one bag?)? Why couldnt I say anything? Because theyre following me on tumblr and twitter.
So now Im being passive aggressive. You know who you are grocery store, have a seminar on proper bag packing with your ladies.

Now, I actually would like all my cans together, or at least not have qualms. And every week when I'm volunteering at the food pantry at Agnes's church (which should get another post), I pack up all the cans together. I guess in that situation it is offensive to say that beggars can't be choosers. Baggers, however, are the choosers. Ha! 

I always end up packing my own bag because I bring my own anyway.

I looked up C-Town on Yelp and I was appalled at the reviews, so I wrote one. They say they have bad customer service because the cashiers don't talk to you too much. What the heck! The ideal grocery store has cashiers who don't talk to you too much and a twitter account that carries whatever you want at the price you want (usually).

Groceries of Belgium: Canned Hot Dogs, Fruit, Orange Juice, Etc.

A correspondent recently traveled to Belgium and sent along these snaps.

Key Food didn't do a very good job. Associated picked up its slack.

I haven't been to Key Food that often lately, though I'm still currently the mayor on Foursquare. I wanted to go today to recycle my grocery bags, buy milk, and buy Fresca. I was also willing to consider buying jalapeno peppers there, but didn't expect much.

I was right to not expect much! They were $4.99/lb! That's highway robbery. In the pop aisle, I saw they brought Diet Rite back, but at the absurd price of $1.99. When I had a Diet Rite habit, I was paying $1.29. They also carry some of the other Dr. Pepper/7Up brands like RC Cola and one I'd never seen before: Sun Drop. What they don't carry, however, is Fresca.  I ended up walking out of the store with only a half gallon of milk (I still like their milk the best) and a jar of store brand mayo.

At Associated, I was much happier. I got beautiful jalapeno peppers for $1.39/lb and they are currently pickling in my refrigerator. I got some orange juice, some Heinz hamburger pickle chips, and Fresca. The Fresca was $1.99, which isn't the correct price, but at least they had it. I was feeling defeated.

C-Town now carries dumpling wrappers

About two weeks ago I was walking through Chinatown to buy dumpling wrappers and thinking about how annoying it is that these are made not far from my house but I have to go to Manhattan to buy them. Then a lightbulb went off over my head and I tweeted a picture to C-Town to ask if they carried them. Yesterday C-Town tweeted me a picture of them back to let me know they're now in. Now I can make dumplings every time I feel spiteful without advance planning. (I exaggerate. If I made dumplings every time I felt spiteful, I'd never get a chance to eat anything else.)

Sriracha

While I was eating my fish tacos, I noticed the price tag on my old bottle of sriracha.  $3.99. I bought a new bottle in Chinatown for $2.29 yesterday. What a deal.

An interesting note about this blog is that all of its hits come from searches for sriracha, rooster sauce, chinese hot sauce, chinese rooster sauce, and misspellings of the same. My favorite hit so far is the search for "Chopin stage fright" which was a post about how I was nervous to shop for Thanksgiving. Here is the last week.

Here's all time.

My Many Trips to C-Town

I've been reading library books at a pace of a book a day (Phillip Roth - Indignation. Bret Easton Ellis - Imperial Bedrooms) and because C-Town's on the way back from the library, I keep going there. Today was my third day in a row. (I got a collection of Jay McInerney's short stories, but don't expect to finish it in a day because I am going to cook the things I bought at C-Town and be social.)

I am happier to be at C-Town with each trip. Yesterday I found my tomato juice I requested and it's at the price I requested: $1.79. I couldn't find my La Squisita artichokes for $1.29. Today I did find them prominently displayed on a front shelf instead of hidden behind other displays in the first row. The best way to hide something from me is to put it prominently displayed. I also picked up 2 more boxes of Barilla whole grain pasta for $1. I ate a box of it yesterday. The box tells me that is 1400 calories of pasta in a day. I made it with an alfredo sauce and it was good enough to stock up. I also got some sausages I had never seen before for $3.50 or so. I'll find out if they're good when I cook them tonight. Pierogies were $3.29. That is more than Key Food lists them as, but exactly as much as Key Food charges me. (Associated had them for $3.39. I checked on the way.)

More Grocery Store Violence. This at Key Food!

I read a terrible thing in the Brooklyn Paper.

Three perps robbed a Grand Street grocery store on Jan 7, pistol-whipping one victim and stealing $800 from the register.
The perps entered the Key Foods near Lorimer Street at 8:45 pm, flashing handguns and demanding the cash. One perp struck a witness’s face with his handgun while the other took the cash.
The thieves ran out of the store five minutes later and one fired a round into the air across the street.

Terrible.

"Crêpe Mix"

A correspondent who spends a lot of time in Manhattan wrote in to say he spotted crêpe mix for sale at Morton Williams for $6.99. As he noted, such a mix is "almost all flour."

Stupid things like crêpe mix contribute to people thinking they don't know how to cook. Nothing galls me like pre-made polenta.  (I can make real polenta in 10 minutes using 1 ingredient.) But I admit I can't tell you if cake mixes fall into this category because I never bothered to try making a cake out of real ingredients.

N.B. I use the circumflexes on the word crêpe because in my other role (I resisted saying rôle) as the editor of a society rag, I had to learn how to make one because every other article describes a "fantastic fête.")

Two Grocery Trips Today!

I'm happy about both. First, I went to Compare (better known as "cat pee") to buy a dozen eggs so I could break my $10 bill to do laundry. I paid $1.75 for extra large, which is apparently as good a price as they come for now. I remember paying $1.25 for medium not that long ago.

Later I went to C-Town. I couldn't find the artichokes I like, but they do carry tomato juice now. Just in time for bloody mary season. It's even at the price I like best ($1.79) and now I never have to go anywhere else for it. I bought some and some Fresca and some pasta shapes that aren't usually on sale, including whole wheat spaghetti. I never buy whole wheat, but I thought it might be good with an alfredo sauce. There's also a really good price on ricotta salata ($7.99/lb) but I have a surfeit of cheese so I held back.

Key Food ripped me off again

The pierogies were labeled $2.99. They cost $3.29. I'm breaking up with Key Food for a while.

I DESPISE grocery store violence

Rep. Gabrielle Giffords (D-AZ) was shot.

Giffords, who was re-elected to her third term in November, was hosting her first "Congress on Your Corner" event at the Safeway in northwest Tucson, NPR reported.

People are nuts.

Grocery Stores that Rip You Off

I didn't know that Key Food's pricing practices were illegal. I thought they were only mean. But Gothamist clarifies.

The DCA has issued almost 750 charges so far this fiscal year, and found that the most common violation was for a lack of item pricing, which is, according to a DCA press release, "particularly troubling given that nearly one in three times supermarkets got it wrong at the cash register."

 Maybe that's not clear. Maybe it's legal to post one price and charge me another. It still makes me mad.

Publix Pix

A correspondent from Florida submitted these pictures to me as a birthday present. Here, with comments, they are.  They are from the Publix in Wellington. Publix is considered the class act of grocery stores.

I didn't realize it was this easy.

The Village Voice goes to Western Beef and takes pictures of its meaty offerings and passes it off as journalism.

The beef, etc.

I could do that.